A wait….little too long!!

“How deep is your love…how deep is your love? ‘Cause we are living in a world of fools…”

Bee Gees crooned on the radio station when I tuned in…..

Yes…How deep was my love, really?

And how do you measure love? Lengthy odes? Letter written in blood? Tears….? Do these measure love to the fullest?

I arrived back at home after a very fulfilling and enjoyable month-long vacation bursting with excitement to share with the world the stories of my vacation, only to find that our precious “Buddy” passed away few hours before our arrival. He was in good health and good care while we were away ……yet he breathed his last in our absence at the age of 6 1/2 yrs.

What thoughts must have passed in this four-legged creature’s mind while he took his last breath? Despair? Hopelessness? Did he have a heart-break? Was he confused about why we left him? Do dogs shed tears? Did he give up on us?

It seems so easy for us humans to fall in and out of love…. Arguments between a couple….solution: break up, ego problems….solution: break up, unfavorable behaviour….solution: break up, long separation…solution: break up and a new partner……

How do these canines love so wholeheartedly….we call ourselves the master of a pet but these simple creatures simply love us as family….

Our BuddyBuddy…..just loved and loved. Whenever I was annoyed and scolded him he would lower his eyes meekly and crawl under the bed…but a slight wave or smile on my face would bring him out wagging his tail, barking away his demands of a pat or tidbit or a hug. He would then sit contented just outside the kitchen door and see me work. Every time I walked back to bedroom he would follow and then back to sitting outside the kitchen. I would talk to him through out the day. He would snuggle up near my feet while I sat reading some book or newspaper. Having made sure that we all were in the house…he would go under the bed and go off to a fitful sleep loudly snoring away to glory without any worries.

He was a little jealous baby…..Whenever I hugged my daughter, Buddy would bark and seek attention by raising his paw …” pet me too!!”he would say. He was an impatient child….though he understood the “sit” command but he couldn’t control himself for more than few seconds when his food was being served. He would sit when told to but bark incessantly till his bowl wasn’t given to him. He was a naughty brat….when playing with his ball he never fetched it instead he would sit with ball in his mouth ready to leap away. He expected  the ball to be snatched from his mouth and thrown again for him to play. He would run away with my bathroom slippers… He was sometimes very dumb….He was not aware of the magnitude of his strength and would sit feeling helpless if his leash was stuck on a moulded plastic lawn chair not realising that with his single pull the chair could be easily dragged to anywhere he wanted..

Buddy and his throneAs a pup he claimed rights over a bean bag and dragged every biscuit and every bite of his dog food on the bean bag. As enjoyable as it was to watch him show annoyance if pushed from beanbag yet I took away his throne one day to wash and put away. He was quite upset but soon took fancy to an oversized stuffed toy  and would sleep with his head resting on the toy.

All he ever wanted was a pat, a hug, food and sweet words and he made us his family ….his dog family. Even though he was over enthusiastic to meet every new person but it was us who he loved most. He never ever however was angry at us….never!!

He had never stayed separated from us for more than ten to twelve days. This time however he waited for a month……Was it a wait too long for him?He hid his anxiety well from everybody else and put up a brave face ….all the while waiting for us to turn up. And then he gave up!!

If only he knew that we were away only for a vacation…we hadn’t left him…we did love him and we were coming back to hug him again, to pat him, to feed him to say loving words to him….

His love for us was so  so deep that he couldn’t bear the separation from us…..but how deep was my love? Did I take him for granted? I feel guilty……..of making him lose hope, of his despair, of his heartbreak, of him feeling unloved and alone…

Had I known the extent of his pining for us….

Why did I not call? Would he have lived after hearing our voice? Would he have waited for us? Would his heart become whole again? If only I could show him once how much I loved him…If I could touch him once more….If only he had seen us once before closing his eyes….

If only I had not made him wait this long…

 

 

 

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Weekly Photo Challenge: Nighttime

Fort wall at Amer Fort, Jaipur with a early full moon

Outer wall of Amer Fort with an early full moon

Amer Fort

Amer Fort at night illuminated for light and sound display

Beach at Havelock Island, Andamans

A stroll on beach at nighttime

Candle light Dinner at Havelock Island, Andamans

Candle light Dinner at Havelock Island, Andamans

 

Also at:

 

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A Web of Fate …

Team name: Vijeta

Roohi sat sulking and whining in a corner watching her parents fight yet again. She had just been given an earful along with a ringing slap by Tara , her mother, for being stubborn.

Roohi was a healthy nine-year old daughter of Tara and Shekhar. Since she was a single child, she was the pampered princess of her father and a  notorious one at that, seeking attention through screaming and throwing tantrums. She, even at such a tender age, preened in front of the mirror and was rather very proud of her fair complexion looking down upon her lesser fair neighbourhood girls. She would frolic around in her frilly frocks and two long pigtail teasing and hitting other children in the gated society’s park of posh Mumbai suburb.

Why can you not just teach her to be little respectful while talking? Look how demanding she has become because of all your pampering!” Tara accused her husband Shekhar as usual.

Oh! Why can you not do the same? Look how you speak…Mothers are the first teachers of a child. Of course she will pick up what she sees!But you don’t have time for her….you are not at home to teach her manners.” retorted Shekhar.

Why, You sit here all day with your lofty dreams of being a best-selling author one day. Can you not pay a little attention towards her. I work all day to pay the bills and you expect me to be around her too? If we both sit at home where will the food come from Mr. Writer?” lashed out Tara.

The blames kept piling till all three were so tired that they slept off without dinner.

Eleven years ago,Tara and Shekhar  had come close to each other due to similar dreams of making it big in the publishing world. They were both passionate about travelling, writing and responsible journalism.

Shekhar Dutta, with an average height and fair complexion was an easy-going and soft-spoken man who always wore a smile on his face. His lean looks were more accentuated with his loose t-shirts, track pants, french beard and thin frame of spectacles. Post his marriage to Tara he had chosen to work as freelance writer so that he could work on a story of a political thriller.

Tara,  a tall and fair woman, however was a practical career oriented person and wanted to make it big as a media professional. She had joined a publishing house as an intern and later got absorbed as a staff member of the same firm. She was a no fuss woman who kept her hair short to avoid early morning delays and was always prim and properly dressed. She was an ambitious woman and loved the idea of power-dressing in formal and high heels. She did look intimidating to her juniors.

The idea of staying at home after Roohi was born did not appeal to Tara so the onus of taking care of the baby fell on Shekhar as he was already there at home. Shekhar did not mind at all the stay-at-home-dad tag.

After eleven years and many rejections from publishers, Shekhar had begun to become impatient and little frustrated.  Though he still wore a smile but now had developed a bald patch on perfectly round head. He had little success as a freelancer but he hung in there to keep his self-respect and to keep himself sane.

This elusive success had become the cause of bitterness and constant fights between Shekhar and Tara. But Shekhar, really hoped and prayed for a big story a dazzling idea to bring change in his status.

Next morning when Tara woke, she was surprised to see  a gloomy Shekhar sipping tea in the small balcony by the bedroom. She saw tears streaming down his eyes and immediately felt guilty for the earlier evening. She moved towards him and hugged him tight.

“I am sorry, Shekhar. I really am! I have felt responsible for Roohi’s deteriorating behavior since many days now and yesterday when you also reiterated the same, I lost my temper. I want to bring in some change in my schedule and have quality family time….I have missed out on it so much…I feel tired Shekhu.” sobbed Tara.

Shekhar folded her in his arms “ I too want some change Tara….I want a little success and I feel frustrated at not being there to pitch in financially. I will stop this futile dream from ruining our life and pick up a job may be!”

No, Shekhar…don’t please! You will succeed…just hang on.I know you are good at fiction, you will get some bright idea.”

Tara started fixing some breakfast. Everyone was hungry from the previous evening and Tara wanted to make it up for her outburst. A thought crossed her mind.

Shekhar, why don’t we take a break and go on a vacation somewhere outside Mumbai? After all that was all what poor Roohi asked for and it will be a much-needed change for us. Maybe you will come across some inspiration with fresh perspective when we travel. What say?

Shekhar warmed up to the idea…He needed a fresh outlook and a time away from home. Yes! they needed a change….They started planning a surprise for Roohi….a big long vacation!

Unknown to them……Fate too conspired  life changing itinerary for them. They knew not what was coming towards them…..

Read the next part of story at http://bhaktimotta.wordpress.com/2014/09/13/a-web-of-fate-2/

 

Me and my team are participating in ‘Game Of Blogs’ at BlogAdda.com.
#CelebrateBlogging with us

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A Room to Relax-Read

relax readRelax-reading is so so different than studying …… And that means no boring study table, table lamp, pens, geometry instruments, maps, history books ….and what not!! Relax read is just that …..read to relax or chill relax and read!

I have been planning to redo the look of my home space to surprise my husband. I found a wonderful site http://makemyhome.com/ for furniture, furnishings and accessories.

I did finalise some of the stuff  to add a zest to my home but I failed to notice my daughter’s pout and sulking face while net surfing for things for our bedroom! Having satisfied myself with things for bedroom, I turned to her in excitement only to see her much annoyed. And the reason for annoyance… why I did not plan to redo her room….thats what!!

Now that was unfair I realised so again we logged in at http://makemyhome.com/ to choose decor things for her relax-reading area….. honestly speaking, an awkward niche in the house actually! I had always wanted to change that area but was always left wondering as to how to go about it. Suddenly this bright idea lit up like a 100 watt bulb, to paint or wallpaper it with some bold colored furniture as accessory.

I made my little princess have a run through the idea. She is quite happy now that mommy dear has given in to her demand to redo her corner as well. What we both agreed upon was the Casual style for the little niche with a bright red bean bag with an extra cushion (which she can hold on to if she so feels like it!!….Her choice!)

The idea looked somewhat like this:

reading corner

With the theme and idea finalised, I have decided to go with  three gorgeous things from the site:

Now when we redo our Bedroom in September, we will redecorate the little reading corner and who knows not only my daughter but also my husband will enjoy a quiet reading of their favorite book in the new space….

 

This post is a part of Makemyhome activity at BlogAdda.com

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My home….my haven

This gallery contains 3 photos.

….And I love introducing small exciting twists and turns in our story of fifteen years of married life. Yes! I will be celebrating my fifteenth wedding anniversary this year in October. We fell in love when I was just about finishing my … Continue reading

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Weekly Photo Challenge: TEXTURE

stone  pattern with fossilised plant

 

A section of a stone wall at Gwalior fort (Madhya Pradesh, India) has a rough texture along with the imprint of fossilized plant.

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_photo_challenge/texture/

 

 

 

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Weekly Photo Challenge: Between

In between the earth and sky

 

My daughter happily soaring in between the blue sky  and grass-covered hills of Dalhousie (Himachal Pradesh).

Dalhousie a small town, named after the British Governor General in India Lord Dalhousie, was developed as summer retreat by the Britishers around five hills of state of Himachal Pradesh(India). With around 600 hotel which include private villas and bungalows, this is a favorite tourism destination. Dalhousie  is between 6000 and 9000 ft above mean sea level.

Though it has many tourist attractions but we were there for only few hours and all we could manage was horse ride and para-sailing.

 

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